MOVIES IN 3-D: Great. Movies in 3-D about secret agent guinea pigs trained to protect the world from certain destruction: Not so great.

Does Disney have no shame? As well as orchestrating the tween world takeover by the likes of the "High School Musical" cast, Miley Cyrus and Selena Gomez / Demi Lovato (who are not only channel-mates, but best friends! Yay!), the worldwide media conglomerate is also trying to force-feed us the cutesy, family-friendly drivel of "G-Force," right in time for summer blockbuster season.

Not only is the film produced by action guru Jerry Bruckheimer, who is in mad love with making things dumb, but its promotional material includes such questionable questions as "Haven't you always wanted to see Nicolas Cage, Tracy Morgan and Penelope Cruz in a movie together?" No. Absolutely not. That sounds awful.

Since Disney stopped focusing on 2-D, the company's awesomeness factor has rapidly declined. It seems like its Pixar division is the only thing keeping the company from sinking into artistic oblivion — "Finding Nemo," "Wall-E" and "Up" had heartwarming storylines that appealed to kids and parents alike — but we have to wait a whole year for "Toy Story 3."

How will Disney fans stay sane until our reunion with Woody and Buzz — or, in the more immediate future, until "G-Force"-mania passes?

By reminiscing about five other Disney flops, of course.

Although Disney's last few 2-D releases ("Atlantis: The Lost Empire" and "Treasure Planet") weren't so hot, they were better than the detritus on our list.